Dealing with the Issue of Sexual Child Abuse
Everywhere, parents hear or read messages pertaining to child sexual abuse. These messages also usually include a warning that this crime can happen anywhere - on the Internet, in school and even in the child's home. But truth is, most parents don't really know how to talk to their kids if they suspect that sexual abuse is occurring.
If you think your child might be getting fundamentalist abuse, remember that you have to talk to him directly. Make sure the conversation is in the right place and at the right time. The most crucial issue here is whether or not your child is comfortable. And never attempt to ask your child while the suspected offender is around.
During your conversation, ask if someone has been touching him in a wrong or uncomfortable way. Because sexual abuse can actually feel good to a victim, asking your child if someone has hurt him will not get you the information and details you're looking for. Then follow up this question by mentioning the incident that got you concerned. Ask your child about, whether it was something he said or did. However, make sure you ask without judgment, and make it a point not to shame your child as you raise your questions. You need to be clear to him that he hasn't done anything wrong and that you just need him to provide more information.
One effective tactic you can use is delving into the subject of secrets. Victims are usually told by their abusers to keep their encounter, and to promise that they won't tell.
The most important thing for you to remember is that you need your child to trust you. He should understand that it's totally fine for him to talk to you about something or someone who may be making him uncomfortable. Always keep your word. If you tell him you'll be there for him, be there for him. Know more about child abuse here at http://www.britannica.com/topic/child-abuse.
It should be known to all kids that they can always say no to any person who deals with them, with or without physical contact, in an uncomfortable manner. Make it known to your child that you will not be angry or mad if he does so. Kids tend to think that telling people not to touch them is wrong. Remind them that there certain parts of their body that are private, and that people who show their private parts to them must be avoided. Additionally, they must know that the next best thing to do after an experience is to immediately tell an adult they trust.
It is important that parents try to hone their sensitivity to signs of child sexual abuse, such as social withdrawal, inappropriate interest in sexual matters, and the like. Early detection means a more effective therapy and less damage to the child's well-being.
